If it could, the music industry would probably criminalise being a female pop star over 40 - and possibly euthanise those who don't immediately don a cardigan and some uggs and pretend they have no sexuality. So when Drake pulled away from Madonna's passionate embrace last night looking like he was about to projectile vomit, the world was on his side.
The view appeared to be this: what on earth was she doing KISSING a man when she's 56 years old?? Kissing a man who lent back into her embrace and tried to stroke her hair. It's disgusting, there's no two ways about it. At her age, she shouldn't be kissing people (yuck), she should be quietly picking out crochet patterns and adopting cats.
Look, Madonna making out with Drake onstage was a bit crass and a bit tacky and a lot attention-seeking... but it surely didn't warrant the shrieking disgust it seems to have received. It lasted about seven seconds, and Drake didn't "flail his arms" to try and get her off, he tipped his head back and tried to seductively stroke her hair before she firmly batted away his hand. It was, in no way, harrowing, gross or traumatic. And no, it is not the equivalent to a male singer forcing himself onto a woman, and arguing that it is ignores history, context and gender dynamics and just basically stop it.
Even respected, mainstream publications couldn't help but share the footage with captions like, "*shudders*" or "harrowing,", or "desperate" Many of them, just to further cement the idea that she's basically a grandma, described it as a "big, sloppy kiss" I can only assume these publications managed to get hold of incredibly high-definition footage to know that it was sloppy. Oh, except Drake did seem to wipe his mouth afterwards, so maybe it was. But that's beside the point.
Those screenshots of Drake's screwed-up face immediately after Madonna has kissed him are enough to bring a smirk to anyone's face. He looks like a petulant little baby. But the hyperbolic disgust with which the internet reacts to Madonna's every move is getting a little old now. As is she, but I don't think she gives a damn. And nor should you.
