by Gigwise Contributor

Festival don'ts: 22 ways to make everyone hate you

Acoustic guitars, filming on an iPad and more of the worst festival crimes

 

Festival don'ts: 22 ways to make everyone hate you Photo:

Festival season is nearly upon us, and while the main concern is what to take - perhaps more attention should be paid on what NOT to do while you're spending three days in a field.

True, festivals are one of the few places where people can escape humdrum, city lives and spend a few grubby days in a tent drinking and partying - but there's a line that needs to be drawn where your fun is spoiling things for others around you.

We've pulled together the 22 things that get on our nerves more than anything else at festivals, from deliberately obscuring the views of others to making sure no one camping near you gets any sleep. Ladies and gentlemen - please don't. Check out our festival donts below...

Girls sitting on shoulders
Sure, it's great for TV coverage of Glastonbury - but a misery for everyone behind you

Taking acoustic guitars
Seriously, did you not think there would be enough live music at the festival?

Bringing suitcases
Yes it is tough hauling holiday luggage across a field, isn't it?

People who moan about everything
It's three days of dirt and hangovers. Suck it up and make the most of it - or just stay at home

Bringing camping chairs into an arena
No one cares that you have had your picnic area laid out since 11am, that six-metre area on the grass (for four people) doesn't belong to you (see Latitude festival 2012)

Pitching your tent on top of someone else's tent
There's nothing quite like waking up with someone else's head touching yours - through two sheets of nylon

Stealing
Just, no

Starting inappropriate mosh pits
Bands such as Two Door Cinema Club should not have circle pits

Angry people as you try to push your way OUT of the crowds
We're not taking space, we're making more space for you. Drop the aggro

Noisy sex in tents
Especially on a Sunday. You haven't had a wash for three days

All night talkers in camp sites
We get it, you're still drunk or high, so how about you make the most of the buzz at the late night tents in the festival instead of making a complete racket in the camping area?

The human centipedes - OF RUDENESS
Linking arms and pushing to the front is unacceptable at any time. We don't care what excuses you use as you push and shove your way through the already-packed crowd - it's just rude

Filming the set with a f*cking iPad
If you thought phones at gigs are bad, iPad b*stards are a whole new level of hell

Pissing in cups - and throwing the cups into the audience
We're fine with not washing for a few days - but that's just disgusting

Drug dealers who appear to have taken half their supply
Sorry sir, your bug-eyes and incessant chewing has put us right off your wares. We'll stick to Strongbow tonight

Jumping around in the crowd wearing a massive rucksack
You don't have a tent where you can leave that thing? Or is it just full of your wet-wipes, moisturiser, rug, spare flip-flops and iPod speakers and other entirely unecessary festival clutter...

ALAN! STEVE!
Shouting this was funny. In 2009

Front row statues
You waiting for two hours to stand there motionless (and probably dehydrated) at the front for your favourite band? Way to go, fun people

Eating your messy food in the middle of a crowd
'Excuse me, we're trying to watch Jessie Ware - must you eat that burrito so close to my face?'

One-song fans
You came all this way, pitched a tent and got covered in mud, just to shout all the way through a band's set because you want to hear their big hit single?

People p*ssing everywhere (and not just the men...)
And you can't walk the 20 yards to the urinals because...? See below for evidence of the consequences of such actions

Campsite real-estate developers
How cute - you've roped off an area and put up spinning windmills and flags, we'll just go and pitch by the toilets shall we? Don't think so...

If you have any festival grumbles that really get on your nerves - let us know below. There must be more than this...


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