Photo: WENN.com
Morrissey's autobiography has finally hit shelves this week after a number of delays and publishing hiccups, and the book is packed with surprising and unexpected revelations about the former Smiths frontman.
The opinionated star frequently airs his often extreme views, much to the disdain of his critics and delight of his loyal fans. Decline of the rhino? Down to "Beyonce's handbags". David and Victoria Beckham? They should be "dragged to the edge of the village and be flogged". Chinese people? "A subspecies". You get the idea.
However, you've got to admit Steven Patrick Morrissey has had a rather colourful life, what with being part of one of the most iconic bands in British history and his hugely successful solo career. So as he releases much-anticipated autobiography, er, 'Autobiography', we take a look at what's between the pages and his views on babies, tramps, and his schooldays...
On his first female crush, who was, confusingly, a man:
"Jerry Nolan on the cover of the [New York] Dolls' debut album is the first woman I ever fell in love with; the hussy-slut positioning of the legs is playmate call-girl, and the pink drum kit might be a rock'n'roll first."
On tramps:
"They always approach children and they always ask for money, their clothes brewing with meth-stench"
On the sound of The Smiths:
"The Smiths' sound rockets with meteroic progression: bomb-burst drumming, explosive chords, combative basslines, and over it all I am as free as a hawk to paint the canvas as I wish. It is a gift from Jesus."
On entering into a serious relationship for the first time:
"For the first time in my life the eternal 'I' becomes 'we', as, finally, I can get on with someone".
On women:
"Girls remained mysteriously attracted to me...and I had no idea why, since although each fumbling foray hit the target, nothing electrifying took place, and I turned a thousand corners without caring … Far more exciting were the array of stylish racing bikes that my father would bring home."
On discussing having a baby with a female friend:
“Tina and I discuss the unthinkable act of producing a mewling miniature monster.”
On his schooldays:
"Kafka-esque in its nightmare...On days of whipping rain we are nonetheless forced outside into a wet yard, as – blatantly beyond logic – we are herded out into the rain with all of its obvious detriments."
On his entrance into the world:
"Naturally my birth almost kills my mother."
On his first TV interview:
"I am rolled out to face an icy grilling from Henry Kelly, a little, pinched Irish madam who has no time for me and cuts me off mid-sentence, with neither a 'thank you' or a 'good luck' as he minces frostily into his next major superstardom moment."
On learning different editions of their eponymous debut existed worldwide:
"I vomit profusely when I discover that the album has been pressed in Japan with Sandie Shaw's version of 'Hand in Glove' included. I am so disgusted by this that I beg people to kill me."
On his career:
"I will sing … If not, I will have to die."
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