Photo: Wenn
Around the time Calvin Harris achieved his ninth number one record, someone decided that he was making EDM look too easy.
When he released ‘Summer’ earlier this year, the persistent grumble among critics was that the Scottish dance producer was somehow tricking everyone into buying his hugely catchy singles. The argument went something like this: by selecting a common theme (a holiday romance) and giving the track an obvious title, he’d somehow conspired to top the charts with ease.
But if we’re not going to allow people to discuss universal experiences in music, the world’s playlists are going to be a lot poorer as a result; you'd have to stop people dancing to 50 Cent on their birthday for starters. Harris makes things seem incredibly effortless, but as the huge number of underwhelming soundalikes now clogging the charts prove, his stadium-sized electronica is harder to replicate than you might think.
Thanks to songs as simple and sophisticated as 'Summer', Harris is now one of British music’s most profitable exports; he topped the DJ rich list (he made £39.6m last year) and achieved the most streamed song of 2014, becoming the first British act to top a billion streams on Spotify.
He currently has achieved daytime radio domination worldwide, has a private jet on call and boasts a production request list as long as the queue to get into his residency at Hakkasan in Las Vegas. Need further convincing? He not only has the talent to headline a massive festival - T In The Park in July - but has the sheer charisma to persuade Will Smith himself to act as his hype man.
Gigwise recently got to experience first hand the power of a Calvin Harris set at the Bacardi Triangle, a one-of-a-kind festival that takes place on a small private island in Puerto Rico. There are so many bat logos that the island begins to resemble Bruce Wayne's summer retreat. There were also some more intriguing touches, including a castaway tied to a homemade float, loudly screaming for ferrygoers to help him find Wilson.
Everything is focused around a massive triangular neon stage positioned near the surf. As darkness falls, crowds of overwhelmed EDM innocents, bikini-clad beach bunnies, bellowing dance bros drinking mint juleps, bartenders tucking into the Hatuey Cuban ale and some very lucky competition winners take their places. Next to the beach a small flotilla of local boats forms, looking to experience the event from just outside the barriers: they create a veritable disco Dunkirk.
Calvin Harris shares the stage tonight with two acts that kick things off in exemplary fashion. Ellie Goulding is captivating: she may only have five key signature dance moves (four more than this writer) but each works a treat. “Do I look like a hot mess right now?” she asks as she throws herself around the stage in a black bikini top and shorts. The rock histrionics with her guitarists are all well and good but nothing tops the moment when all the lights single her out during her drum solo on 'Salt Skin'. This is officially her last show of her Halycon Days tour: it’s proven her as pop act with a true global appeal and we can't wait to see what she does next.
Kendrick Lamar follows: stalking the stage, wearing a cap and jeans and talking about "realising your full motherfucking potential". Instantly he's on point: “Swimming Pools (Drank)” may be the single most appropriate song for an event hosted by a rum company at a luxury resort. His set, unsurprisingly, is heavy on major label debut good kid MAAD City, bar a vigorous run through of his remix of ASAP Rocky’s ‘Fuckin' Problems'. Lamar is hugely charismatic - and what other hip-hop star on the planet could get away with asking the crowd to sing 'Happy Birthday' to his DJ before smushing cake into the subject's afro?
Lamar only suffers a tiny setback due to his small audience's lack of familiarity with his material: expecting a crowd of competition winners to know all the words to 'Backseat Freestyle' turns out to be beyond them. Also his link "....and most importantly nobody’s vibe got killed" is only saved by the massive hip-hop anthem that follows it. By the time that ‘i’ kicks in - all Isley Brothers' Seventies' funk and contemporary Compton swagger - you know that when TDE finally releases Lamar's new LP, it's going to be a blockbuster.
Despite both of his superlative supports, Harris is unquestionably the main event. He is also the only act to fly in only overnight. It feels strangely appropriate that Harris missed the 'Black Magic' Halloween party the night before and as such didn't get to see either Goulding dressed as a native American and Lamar as Black Jesus (or, for that matter, the world’s only bikini clad Snow White, slutty Amelia Earhart and 'sexy' Toothless from How To Train Your Dragon). Harris is, after all, here in Puerto Rico on business: the highly lucrative art of making speakers shake.
After a few necessary press commitment preliminaries - he tells The Sun backstage that he’s not on the new Rihanna album (and tells the Mirror that ‘We Found Love’ is about a ham sandwich) - Harris is ready to go to work.
For a gig with a capcity of under 2000, the production is fit for a festival main stage. Every drop is accompanied by confetti, fireworks, plumes of smoke or all three. The visuals are extraordinary: swirling and interconnecting maelstroms of digital technology.
The set list is so huge you could see it from space: - Harris productions (Rihanna’s peerless 'We Found Love', Florence’s 'Sweet Nothing') and failsafe proven party starters (the A-Trak version of 'Heads Will Roll', Icona Pop’s ‘I Don’t Care’, Fatboy Slim's 'Eat Sleep Rave Repeat', Kiesza’s 'Hideaway', Route 94’s 'My Love').
Those expecting more tracks from his new record Motion don't quite get their moment. Personally we would have loved to have heard the new Haim collaboration but it wasn't to be. Similarly the predicted Goulding collaboration - they are both on the same private Puerto Rican island after all - didn’t materialise, but no-one seems to mind. Theo Hutchcraft from Hurts was also backstage - he too decides to shun the stage this time round.
By the close of his set, Harris has only uttered about two tweets worth of on stage chat, a mere 280 characters of EDM exultation, but we didn't need to hear anything more. What's clear is that Motion, even battling the seemingly unstoppable Taylor Swift, should look set to crush the competition. There isn't a producer at the moment who has so completely determined what the world dances to right now. Our view from some distant beach? We're just placing bets on which of Motion's remaining 14 tracks will guarantee him his next number one.
