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(Un)happy New Year: 12 terrible musical calendars to ruin 2014
12 months of misery from rubbish stars
Cliff Richard: Who else could we kick off with other than Original Terrible Calendar purveyor Cliff Richard? The shirtless, asexual lothario has been bothering our mother's almanacs since the dawn of time, and his reign of toupee'd terror doesn't seem to end anytime soon. Witness this Brokeback Mountain-inspired 2014 cover. Stunning.
The year is almost over, and for those of us who still rely on good old fashioned paper to plan the months ahead, it's time to buy a calendar.
Unfortunately, due to phones, computers and other technological advances of the 21st century the calendar is a dying art form, and Jesus Christ (happy birthday sir), you can tell that from looking at the sorry offerings we've spotted.
There's calendar stalwart Cliff Richard, who seems to have watched Brokeback Mountain a few times this year, as well JLS, who we thought had finally quit music. There's also poor Britney, who appears to have been Photoshopped the life out of, and a dark glimpse into Gary Barlow's future in a retirement home.
We've compiled the worst 2014 calendars on the market - buy one for someone you absolutely hate.
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