Wednesday 8th January 2014 by Andrew Trendell | Photos by WENN.com / Press / Jimmy King

Happy Birthday: A guide to growing old gracefully with David Bowie

How does the coolest 67-year-old do it?

Look this cool/young in a flat-cap: Seriously, how does he do it? No wonder he was crowned one of GQ's best dressed men of 2014.

Be talking about drugs, sex and war all at once: Yep, it's enough to make most older men blush. But Bowie's brilliantly vivid lyrics to The Next Day highlight 'I'd Rather Be High' show him as still one of the best narrators of all time.

Sound good in clubs: Yeah, your old man would do well to stay away from 'discotheques' (I bet they still call them that as well), but with James Murphy's epic Steve Reich remix of 'Love Is Lost', no 68-year-old has ever sounded this brilliant or vital on the dancefloor.

Dance around with dolls of himself: Most men in their 60s would get sectioned locked up in a home for this, but the music video for James Murphy's remix of 'Love Is Lost' was one of the coolest and most compelling of the year (and it was made for just eight quid)

Inspire Lady Gaga: Last year, Gaga told Alan Carr: "Every morning I wake up and I think 'what would Bowie do?'" Rather than turn on Radio 4, eat porridge and complain about the traffic, what that means from this 68-year-old is usually something baffling, unexpected and game-changing.

Look this good for Louis Vuitton: Mutton dressed as lamb? Never. Just a genius, dressed a king.

Make Arcade Fire even cooler: Say 'Arcade Fire' to most men of that age and they'll call the emergency services and mourn the loss of another 2p machine, but say it to Bowie and he jumps on board to make their already awesome comeback track 'Reflektor' all the better - drenching it with his inimitably mind-melting croon.

Top the Official Record Store chart: When most men of that age enter an independent record store, it's usually to ask for directions to the nearest BHS - but not Bowie. In 2013, The Next Day was deservedly the most-bought album in independent UK record stores for the year.

Hold hands with Lorde: 'Man in late 60s finds 17-year-old girl at party to hold hands'. Pretty creepy headline, eh? Well, normally yes - but this was just one legend passing on musical wisdom to a rising star. Recalling when Bowie met Lorde at Tilda Swinton's birthday, Lorde said: "It was super cute - for some reason we were holding hands and just staring into each other�s eyes and talking, and I was like, 'This is David Bowie's hand, what am I doing?' It was insane. A beautiful moment."

Put clothes on show: Imagine if your dad or some random 68-year-old bloke put his wardrobe on display to world. It would largely be cardigans and Matalan jeans. But no - the David Bowie Is exhibition was a masterclass in the art of fashion.

Offend the Christian world by dressing as Christ: Yup, for most men, they leave their Jesus smocks and their sacrilegious ways in their mid-to-late 20s, but Bowie's video for The Next Day's title track invited The Catholic League to brand him a "switch-hitting, bisexual senior citizen from London".

Writhe around on the floor with Tilda Swinton: Most 68-year-old men can't, but Bowie bloody can. Why? Because they're one and the same: Andrognynous, sphinx-like, immortal, incredible.

Tags: David Bowie

Happy Birthday David Bowie, you God-like giant of music, you. Yes, today marks the day that Bowie turns 67. Yes, 67. Makes you sick doesn't it? How can he look and sound so brilliant and omit such magnetic waves of glory that artists a third of his age can only dream of? HOW DOES HE DO IT?

Last year, The Thin White Duke Mr David Bowie was even voted 'the Best Dressed Briton of all time'. ALL TIME. Never mind your Gallaghers, your Beatles, your Paul Wellers, Vivienne Westwoods, Paul Smiths and even your Alexander McQueens - Bowie even ranked ahead of the sharply-dressed Queen Elizabeth I and iconic Duchess of Devonshire Georgina Cavendish. Thousands of years of British style and one man reigns supreme. But how? How can one freaky, ageing Londoner surpass all others to be labelled not only as the coolest rock star of the last century, but the most stylish British human being in all of our history?

Simple: He has always embodied the style of the time, moving like a chameleon from era to era. Bar a few minor slip-ups, he's always grown old gracefully and stayed true to his artistry.

Well done, Bowie - we salute you.

While many of his peers and contemporaries have either faded into obscurity or aged into embarassing elder statesmen of cringeworthy dad antics - Bowie is still the king of cool. Here's how to grow old gracefully in the style of David Bowie.

The past belongs in the past
The V&A exhibition taught two things: 1) That Bowie's influence crosses genres, decades and mediums, and 2) That he moves on relentlessly. As iconic as Bowie's life as Ziggy Stardust was, he killed him and tried something else, again and again. As tempting as the multi-million offers must have been, you just won't see Bowie prancing about in a leotard and facepaint in his sixties. The past belongs in the past - take note, Kiss and Alice Cooper.

What mid-life crisis?
Your dad may reach an age where he gets a piercing, dyed hair, tattoos and a motorcycle. When Bowie was in his forties (yeah, he had piercings and dyed hair etc) he was making bat-shit mental gothic artrock..and something that was a bit like drum and bass. Either way, he had his finger on the pulse and looked and sounded amazing.

He's a walking mannequin
Tommy Hilfiger, Alexander McQueen, Louis Vuitton - the list of designers who clamour to pin their wares on the coolest man on Earth is endless. Here he is looking achingly majestic in the latest Louis Vuitton campaign.

Survival
Most icons have their fair share of embarassing moments. Macca is still plagued by 'Frog Song', Prince has his attempt at hip-hop, and Bowie is no exception. The Labyrinth is a thing that happened and we all have to live with it. Fortunately, while it may be unnerving enough to make the moon cringe, it panders to two of Bowie's best sides: the eccentric and the mainstream genius. Who else could survive this, go on to still prove himself relevant in decades to come and go on to be crowned coolest Brit of all time? (As a result, we'll even forgive him for 'Dancing In The Street').

He can laugh at himself
From his self-depricating on-stage humour to his appearance in Extras, Bowie's humour seems to be one of the main factors in keeping The Man Who Fell To Earth's feet firmly on the ground. We don't see David Gilmour or Pete Townsend in any rush to take the piss out of themselves.

He's still the go-to guy of cool
How does he do it? This year alone, he's appeared on the cover of NME three times without even uttering a word. No interviews, no public or live appearances, no constant Tweeting about what he's had for lunch - and yet he's dominated every sphere of culture throughout 2013. From the V&A exhibition to the Radio Soulwax 'Dave' mini-movie and the worldwide celebration every time he drops a star-studded music video, Bowie's absence has proven to be more of a presence, letting his art and legacy do the talking without entering the public realm. He's made Arcade Fire's new album even MORE of an event, forced LCD Soundsystem's James Murphy to come out of remix retirement and Louis Vuitton still wants him to be the face of his latest ad campaign.

The video for James Murphy's Steve Reich remix for 'Love Is Lost' says it all. Here stands Bowie - drawing on the images and sounds of the past, gripped by the present and still looking and sounding like he's from the future. No one is more in demand than Bowie.

He's not really human, is he?
Who else could star alongside Tilda Swinton and make it look like a perfect mirror: Andrognynous, sphinx-like, immortal, incredible.