by Edward Keeble | Photos by WENN.com
The Gigwise fantasy festival: this is basically the best weekend ever
You won't see a better line-up all year
Friday 2pm - The Introducing Stage - Crosses: You need something of a musical slap in the face to get the festival juices flowing. Enter Chino Moreno with Crosses, an exciting fusion between the more melodic elements of Deftones and Nine Inch Nails.
Friday 4pm - The Introducing Stage - Banks: One of the hottest properties of the last year, Banks is an act who we are dying to catch live and what better proving ground than the baying wolves of a festival crowd in the afternoon on the first day.
Friday 5pm - The Introducing Stage - Say Lou Lou: With the warm up fully underway, it's time to take things to the next level before the main stage. Best to check out the superb Say Lou Lou with their epic dance infused melodies and soaring epicness.
Friday 6pm - The Main Stage - The Maccabees: Hail the return of one of the greatest festival and album bands, whipping out their long delayed new material from their untitled September album, they tear up the stage. As they have said in interviews they are raising the standard so it's sure to be mind blowing stuff.
Friday 7pm - The Main Stage - The Yeah Yeah Yeahs: You're getting pretty tipsy now, moral boundaries seem to have vacated and Karen O just climbed on stage. Shit is about to get crazy.
Friday 8pm - The Main Stage - Arcade Fire: Time to expand your mind with one of the best live bands on the planet and look who steps out for a guest slot on 'Reflektor' - David Bowie.
Friday 9pm - The Main Stage - David Bowie: The Duke himself is on the bill for a one off performance and its every music fans wet dream bringing the main stage to a stupendous close.
Friday 11pm - The Dance Stage - John Talabot: It's getting dark and it's time to warm up again after you've shoved a kebab down your gob. The warm progressive Talabot beats get you back in the mood as the dark of the night begins to set in.
Saturday 1am - The Dance Stage - Jackmaster b2b Oneman: Back in the flow again it's time for two hours from two of the best DJ's on the planet, perfectly manipulating the crowd as they usually do with a slew of dance floor classics and ridiculous mash-ups.
Saturday 3am - The Dance Stage - Disclosure: Young production duo Disclosure bring down the curtain on the first night with their selection of endless anthems from 2013. They leave you leave you hyped as you stumble back to your tent. Which is, by the end of the first night, an utter disaster zone. It's time to sleep.
Saturday 12pm - The Dance Stage - Dub Pistols: So you've got a bastard hangover - you hit it too hard on the first night. Rookie mistake. Grab yourself a Bloody Mary and go check Dub Pistols. They are pretty much the best festival band on the planet.
Saturday 1pm - The Introducing Stage - Arthur Beatrice: You're still feeling a little fuzzy headed so you head to see the awesome Arthur Beatrice for some wholesome goodness.
Saturday 2pm - The Introducing Stage - Thumpers: By the time Thumpers hit the stage all the evils of last night have been exorcised and it's time to pick up the pace with some electro tinged indie.
Saturday 3pm - Introducing Stage - Chance the Rapper: James Blake's new chum Chance brings his A game for a performance showing exactly why he has been tipped for big things, even dropping a track produced by his new roomy that defies a genre pigeonhole.
Saturday 4pm - The Main Stage - The National: It might be an early set for a band as amazing and big as the National but they fill the extended hour and a half slot with hugely intricate songs from Trouble Will Find Me.
Saturday 5:30pm - The Main Stage - Sigur Ros: Sigur Ros bring a much needed visual flair to the stage, giving the crowd time to rest and soak up the ambience of a cinematic performance from Jonsi and company.
Saturday 7pm - The Main Stage - Queens of the Stone Age: It's time for hands down one of the best festival bands on the planet with flawless set construction, crowd interaction and a collection of youth defining tracks, they become a highlight of the weekend.
Saturday 9pm -The Main Stage - Arctic Monkeys: Alex Turner and co seem to be unable to take anything but a headline slot, following on from the success of AM.
Saturday 11pm - The Dance Stage - Pharrell Williams: The new master of funk pulls out the anthemic 'Get Lucky', plus his own smash 'Happy' and proves he has enough material to headline Coachella.
Sunday 1:30am - The Dance Stage - 2 Many DJ's: The ultimate closure to any festival date ever, the duo lend their incredible mash-up skills and selection to terrific effect, playing until the wee hours of the morning. As you head back to your tent, you realize your tolerance for no sleep and booze has increased. You resolve to drink more tomorrow.
Sunday 12pm - The Introducing Stage - Asgeir: You wake up mysteriously without a hangover, but needing to relax you head over to the introducing stage to check out the sublimely chilled vibes of Icelandic prodigy Asgier.
Sunday 1pm - The Introducing Stage - FKA Twigs: You hang around to check out the new signing to the Young Turks record label and are blown away by an incredibly powerful performance from such a fresh artist.
Sunday 3pm - The Introducing Stage - Sky Ferreira: Ignore the pouting and the fact she is an ex-model with a rocker boyfriend - Sky Ferreira is the real deal and a future pop superstar.
Sunday 4pm - The Main Stage - Chvrches: After putting out perhaps the greatest album of 2013, Chvrches kick proceedings off on the main stage with the kind of performance that makes the spine tingle.
Sunday 5pm - The Main Stage - The Weeknd: The spaced out feeling created by three days of festivaling elevates as The Weeknd takes to the stage and lends the evening a moody atmosphere.
Sunday 7pm - The Main Stage - Outkast: The reunion train rumbles on for legends Outkast who perform a set of classics from their extensive back catalogue, updated for the modern day, along with a slew of new material. Atlanta is back.
Sunday 9pm - The Main Stage - Daft Punk: As the sun sets on the final evening, the French production duo play one of the most amazing sets in the history of dance music, incorporating a light show that becomes progressively more epic as the performance reaches the festival defining conclusion.
Sunday 11pm - The Dance Stage - Hudson Mohawke b2b Rustie: Keeping up the intensity the meeting of two of the Numbers labels greatest creates a mind melding mix of genres from grime, to video games, to hip-hop and techno.
Monday 1am - The Dance Stage - Despacio: 2 Many DJ's are back for the second time this weekend only this time with legend James Murphy for an all vinyl disco set to expand the mind.
Monday 3am - The Dance Stage - Richie Hawtin: For those last standing it's time for the master and one of the best dj's on the planet to close proceedings out until 6am. As you travel home afterwards you begin to cry like a soppy baby because you have work tomorrow.
Tags: Disclosure, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, David Bowie, Banks
This week the festival announcements are coming thick and fast with extensions to the Field Day, Sonisphere and Latitude bills. And things are looking pretty good.
However there are still so many more headliners to be revealed with Glastonbury, Reading and more still keep their cards close to their chests.
That got us to thinking of what if we had an infinite budget and could curate a festival of our own, who would we pick? Assuming like in the case of fantasy football we could have anyone we wanted (they have to be alive and still making music however). The following is a guide to the line-up of absolute fantasy, hangovers and all...