Colleen Ballinger is an American comedian, actress, and content creator recognized for her talent in mixing humor, music, and storytelling.

She gained huge fame with her quirky and sarcastic alter ego, Miranda Sings, who took off the world of fame and internet culture.

Her work, seen in her popular YouTube series and musical performances, has made her a well-known figure in the digital entertainment industry, marking her place as one of the leading content creators of her generation.

About the Song

Toxic Gossip Train is a sarcastic song that humorously addresses the drama and negativity surrounding online gossip. With playful lyrics and upbeat melodies, Colleen reflects on the stupidy of internet culture, all while poking fun at the relentless nature of social media rumors.

Toxic Gossip Train by Colleen Ballinger Lyrics

Spoken

Hey
It’s been a while since you saw my face
I haven’t been doing so great
So I took a little break
So a lot of people are saying some things about me that aren’t quite true
Doesn’t matter if it’s true though
Just as long as it’s entertaining to you, right?
You guys having fun?

Chorus

All aboard the toxic gossip train
Chugging down the tracks of misinformation
The toxic gossip train
You got a one-way ticket to manipulation station
Toxic gossip train
Tie me to the tracks and harass me for my past
Those rumors look like facts if you don’t mind the gaps
I won’t survive in the crash, but hey
At least you’re havin’ fun

Spoken

Uh, hi, everyone
I’ve been wanting to come online and talk to you about a few things
Um, even though my team has strongly advised me to not say what I want to say
I recently realized that they never said that I couldn’t sing what I wanna say, so
Here I am, and um, today, I only wanna talk about the facts
So I hope that you’ll be willing to listen
Here we go
Many years ago, I used to message my fans
Uh, but not in a creepy way like a lot of you are trying to suggest
It was more of a loser kind of way
Where I was just trying to be besties with everybody
It was kinda like, uh, when you go to like a family gathering, you know?
And there’s a weird aunt there who keeps coming up to you and going like, “Hey, girl, what’s the tea?”
And you’re like, “Eh”
Um, that was me, but in group chats with my fans, it was weird

Verse 1

I’ve been sharing my life online for over fifteen years
I’ve poured my heart out to you, and because of that, I feel
Like I’m talking to my friends, but in the beginning of my career
I didn’t really understand that maybe there should be some boundaries there
There were times in the DMs when I would overshare
Details of my life, which was really weird of me
I haven’t done that for years, you see
‘Cause I changed my behavior, and I took accountability

Spoken

But that’s not very interesting, is it?

Chorus

So let’s go on the toxic gossip train
The locomotive’s fueled with hateful accusations
The toxic gossip train
Steamroll over someone’s reputation
Toxic gossip train
Hop on board, but close your eyes, otherwise, you’ll realize
That the train is made of lies and that person you despise
Maybe didn’t deserve to die
But hey, at least you’re havin’ fun

Spoken

In all seriousness, I do think it’s really important to hold people accountable for their mistakes
Um, you know, we should hope that everyone can learn from their mistakes
And grow and change their behavior and be a better person
This is something that I’ve always tried to do when I make mistakes
And it’s something that I will continue to try to do—what?
Oh, you don’t care? Oh, okay

Verse 2

I thought you wanted me to take accountability
But that’s not the point of your mob mentality, is it? No
Your goal is to ruin the life of the person you despise
While you dramatize your lies and monetize their demise

Spoken

Yeah, um, I feel like I can already hear the comments on this video
“She’s gaslighting, manipulating”
“Ugh, she’s a narcissist and a rat”
“I would never make a mistake like that”

Verse 3

Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize
That all of you are perfect, so please, criticize me
Bring out the daggers made from your perfect past
And stab me repeatedly in my bony little back
I’m sure you’re disappointed in my shitty little song
I know that you wanted me to say that I was one hundred percent in the wrong
Well, I’m sorry, I’m not gonna take that route
Of admitting to lies and rumors that you made up for clout

Verse 4

“Hey, everybody, I found someone new to harass
She did some things that I do not like in her past
So, everybody, gather ’round ’cause we’re about to attack”
But not based on facts, oh, no
Your loaded lethal weapon is your fingers on the keys
You don’t need any armor when you can hide behind a screen
So, shoot me down quick with a click, and bam
My reputation’s deceased

Spoken

Uh, I also wanted to take a minute to talk about that girl, Miranda Sings
You know the one, yeah, her?
Uh, she’s PG-13, it says that on my website

Verse 5

And it’s always been that way
And that’s why you won’t find my videos on the YouTube Kids app
Anyway, um, I didn’t realize it was my responsibility
To decide what was appropriate for every kid to see
I’ve always relied on parents to decide if they’re comfortable
With their families watching my YouTube videos or coming to my live shows
Now, have I made some jokes in poor taste? Yes
Have I made lots of dumb mistakes? Yes
Am I sad that there’s some fans that feel betrayed? Yes
But was my intention to manipulate? No

Spoken

It doesn’t really matter what my intention was
‘Cause it seems as though everyone’s already decided on that
Let me tell you, it’s not very fun to have millions of people all over the world
Call you the most vile, horrendous, disgusting, life-ruining words
That a person can be called, in my opinion
Um, it doesn’t matter that these things aren’t true
Uh, everyone just believes that you are the type of person who manipulates and abuses children
So, I just wanted to say that, um
The only thing I’ve ever groomed is my two Persian cats
I’m not a groomer, I’m just a loser

Verse 6

Who didn’t understand I shouldn’t respond to fans
And I’m not a predator even though a lot of you think so
Because five years ago, I made a fart joke
So even though I know this video won’t change anyone’s mind about me
I still felt it was important to come on here and defend myself a little
And take accountability
And I also wanted to say that
To anyone out there who has ever supported me in any capacity

Spoken

I really, really appreciate you, thank you
For what it’s worth, I never had any bad intentions
But I do feel like shit

Chorus

The toxic gossip train
You’re chugging down the tracks of misinformation
Toxic gossip train
You got a one-way ticket to manipulation station
Toxic gossip train
You tied me to the tracks and harassed me for my past
Rumors look like facts when you don’t mind the gaps
I won’t survive in the crash, but hey
I hope you had some fun

Spoken

Actually, you know, I feel like maybe I should let you guys know something, um
Seems like maybe you’re confused about something? I don’t know
Let me try to help, um

Outro

Sometimes people make a mistake and it doesn’t make ’em a horrible person, woah
Sometimes people can make a mistake and they’re still a good person
Crazy, I know
Sometimes people can make a mistake and you don’t have to take that mistake, oh, no
And twist it up and grind it and add some lies to it and pulverize it
And stab it with knives and ruin a life, and oh, no
Sometimes people can make a mistake, it doesn’t mean you gotta send them hate, oh, no
Sometimes people can make a mistake and you can kindly let them know and help them to grow
Sometimes people make mistakes simply because they made a mistake
And that mistake doesn’t make them a terrible human
It just makes them a human

Spoken

But what do I know?
Fuck me, right?

Similar Songs Like Toxic Gossip Train

If Toxic Gossip Train caught your attention, here are a few more tracks with similar playful vibes and clever commentary on pop culture and internet drama.

• “Becoming Ugly” by Miranda Sings: This song features Colleen Ballinger’s comedic style take on fame, similar to the humorous approach in “Toxic Gossip Train.”
• “Where My Baes At?” by Miranda Sings: Known for its catchy hooks and comedic lyrics, this song showcases Ballinger’s ability to craft humorous musical content.
• “Starships“ by Miranda Sings: This song offers a blend of comedy and pop elements, featuring Ballinger’s signature style of humor and satire.
• “Do The Miranda!” by Miranda Sings: This track features a similar blend of humor and pop music, highlighting Ballinger’s comedic talent and sarcastic approach to fame and celebrity culture.

Similar Artists Like Colleen Ballinger

For fans of Colleen Ballinger’s fun, musical humor, these artists also bring comedy and creativity to their songs.

• “Weird Al” Yankovic
  Genres: Comedy, Parody
  Top Albums: “Weird Al” Yankovic in 3-D (1984), Off the Deep End (1992), Bad Hair Day (1996)
• The Lonely Island
  Genres: Comedy, Hip-Hop
  Top Albums: Incredibad (2009), Turtleneck & Chain (2011), The Wack Album (2013)
• Tenacious D
  Genres: Comedy Rock, Hard Rock
  Top Albums: Tenacious D (2001), The Pick of Destiny (2006), Rize of the Fenix (2012)
• Flight of the Conchords
  Genres: Comedy, Folk, Rock
  Top Albums: The Distant Future (2007), Flight of the Conchords (2008), I Told You I Was Freaky (2009)

Frequently Asked Questions

What’s the Meaning Behind Toxic Gossip Train?

Toxic Gossip Train addresses controversy with a song that deflects criticism, presenting herself as a victim of rumors rather than acknowledging wrongdoing.

Is Toxic Gossip Train on Spotify?

Yes, Toxic Gossip Train is on Spotify.

What are the Chords for Toxic Gossip Train?

The chords for Toxic Gossip Train by Colleen Ballinger are G, G7, C, D7, E7, and Cm.