IV Thieves – ‘If We Can’t Escape My Pretty’ (One Little Indian) Released 26/02/07

IV Thieves are not your average band. With a background history that makes the Krypton Factor seem easier than Bruce’s Price Is Right, they’re a tricky bunch to decipher. In fact, if you’re already wondering who the hell the IV Thieves actually are, then Gigwise can sympathise with you. Since their 2004 conception the band haven’t exactly been a model of consistency. To date, they’ve operated under three names (with the IV Thieves being their third – and hopefully final), lost a drummer and found a new one and, therefore, not surprisingly, only managed to release one album – 2004’s ‘The Greatest White Liar.’

If you delve into the history of the band, however, their instability is a little more understandable. The band’s lead singer Nic Armstrong only found himself in possession of a record deal in 2004 thanks to his girlfriend, who sent his tape demos off to labels without his knowledge. The critically acclaimed, ‘The Greatest White Liar,’ was then recorded and released so quickly poor Armstrong could barely realise what day of the week it was, let alone comprehend the fact that Nic Armstrong and the Thieves (as they were then called) were suddenly following Oasis, Paul Weller and The Bravery around suitably sized venues across the globe. It’s a story that teenage dreams couldn’t even comprehend, let alone create.

Now an Anglo-Saxon outfit (Texan, Elliot Frazer has replaced Johnny Aitkin on drums) that’s based in Austin, Texas, you’d expect the IV Thieves’ (as they are now called) second album to be a record that encapsulates the last three years and bottles them for safe keeping. Sadly, as ‘You Can’t Love What You Don’t Understand’ unravels it seems Armstrong is still swirling in the whirlwind of the whole situation. With breathless vocals and a guitar riff straight from a grade one music class, it’s not what you’d expect from a band who’ve supported with such high profile glitterati.

Rather than being a celebration - from the sombrely entitled ‘The Day Is A Downer’ which sounds like New Order on suicide watch, to morose squeals of ‘Die In Love’ - ‘If We Can’t Escape My Pretty’ sounds like an album that’s been made by a band looking for the nearest fire exit. And, although ‘Catastrophe’ provides a dim light of hope, it’s by no means strong enough to pick the album out of the dark hole it’s been recorded in.     

‘If We Can’t Escape My Pretty’ should be Armstrong’s album to write home about. Sadly, despite its occasional encouraging moments, you’ll be hoping – that if he has put pen to paper – that the letter gets lost in transit.