Download is over for yet another year. Your tent is stowed away, your clothes are in the wash and you've chipped all of that solid Leicester soil away from your wellies. It's been a couple of days since your last beer, and while your hangover may be starting to disappear, you find yourself gripped by an entirely different affliction: The Post-Download Blues.
Modern medicine is still struggling to find a cure for this terrible disease. Rumour has it that scientists have just been getting monkeys drunk, pushing them in the mud and making them listen to 'Party Hard' by Andrew WK on loop.
The only real answer is to do it all again, but for now let us share in our suffering. These are the 19 surefire signs and symptoms that you're suffering from the post-Download Festival Blues.
- READ ALSO: Review - The 14 greatest moments of Download Festival 2015
1. You can now only show appreciation by starting circle pits. This does not go down well in work situations
Photo: Press
2. You are addicted to pyro, feeling utterly at a loss unless something nearby is on fire
3. You are constantly gazing into the sky, baffled when a plane does not fly overhead every 30 seconds
4. You went to the shop or pub, and were asked to leave when you could not pay by tapping your wrist on the counter
5. You are repulsed by all fluids that are not warm Tuborg
6. You almost spoke to a stranger on the train, just because you thought they were wearing a Download wristband. The real world is not quite so friendly
7. You have forgotten how to walk on firm ground or concrete, knowing only the boggy marshes of Donington
8. You now wish you were in BABYMETAL after watching Dragonforce, and feel absolutely no shame in knowing every single part of THAT dance
9. You were invited on a night out, but refuse to go because it doesn't look like this
Photo: Ben Jablonski
10. You can't even contemplate the idea of going to work, as you might as well be going to the moon
11. Every time you *think* you hear the word 'Muse', you scream back "YOU WERE NOT THERE, MAN - YOU DON'T KNOW"
Photo: Thanira Rates
12. You now consider this to be normal attire
13. You have never experienced a freedom quite like that of not having to wear your wellies today
14. You see a man in a boiler suit and your immediate reaction is to get down on your knees before jumping up and screaming 'FUCK ME, I'M ALL OUT OF ENEMIES'. This frightens most plumbers
Photo: Thanira Rates
15. You do not realise it yet, but all of your Facebook friends and Instagram followers who were not at Download all despise you
16. You can only sleep to the distant sound of a double bass pedal
17. You find that no matter how dry you get, you will always be wet from that storm on Friday night
18. And when in doubt, you just throw the horns
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