Janne Oinonen

13:45 2nd May 2006

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Long after Starsailor and the rest of the piffle-pushing comfort-rock squad have been relegated to the dustbin of history as a minor footnote in annals of appalling blandness, this tediously thudding third single from the Wigan foursome’s ‘On The Outside’ LP might find a new lease of life on music tech courses as undisputable proof that even the costliest turd-polishing expertise modern top-dollar recording studios can muster can’t conceal a total lack of ideas, tunes, substance and spark. In their minds this arena-sized blast of empty bombast probably resembles U2 in their earnest 80’s pomp. I reality, it’s closer to the ham-fisted bellowing of Simple Minds at their most abysmally anthemic. The delusional cheek this prosaic bunch had when naming their troupe after Tim Buckley’s experimental zenith can’t be described in words. Neither can the sheer crapness of this pedestrian pap.

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