More about: Emma Bradley

“The only title it could’ve been when I had these songs on the EP was Grow Or Die”, Emma Bradley tells us. Setting up paints on her dining table next to the piano she wrote the majority of these tracks on, the atmosphere in her home matches her work perfectly; reflective, vulnerable, tender and deeply creative as we look round at paintings and a multitude of instruments.

“It was such a process. It was made over two years of revisiting songs constantly and reworking them. I think it's cool that all the songs have lived so many lives, they all had such different origins and have come so far through so many different versions. But the result is something I'm so proud of, I think I got it right.”

And right is an apt word. As an artist with synesthesia, creating is a game of spot the difference for Emma, aligning sounds with the sights in her mind. “When I listen to music or begin writing something, I have a strong idea of what it feels like in terms of colours or a physical vision or texture. It helps me finish a song because I already know what it looks like before I even start, or at least I have an idea of what the essence of it is,” she explains. “Piano is always cooler tones and guitar is warmer tones - which is something I've had since I was a kid. I’d mention it to other kids in my music class about the colours I'd see for different sections like brass or strings thinking everyone had that but apparently not…”

Laughing as she talks us through the colours of each day of the week, the brushes are wet, the canvases are ready for a track by track told through mental images, hues and swirls. Taking us through Grow Or Die, her sophomore EP that ended up as a kind of travelogue of the love, loss and healing of recent years - Emma paints us a picture of each song… literally.

‘Square One’

The Story:

"I have a box in my room of memories and mementos from people. I used to call it my date hate box but then I realised that sounded… a bit much. It has things in it like a book someone gave me that i can’t get rid of or like cards or letters that you look through and it brings everything back up in a way that isn’t necessarily negative, but reflective. I find it really difficult to let go of people and move on, that became clear on this EP."

The Sound:

"It was written on the piano and slowly built up which I sometimes find quite stressful, adding anything onto what feels like a song in its purest form. But it just became something far bigger and more designed in terms of layers and vocal production which was a real turning point of realising what the song needed to be. The second it became more electronic I knew that was the texture I was looking for because it felt cool and raw like how I saw the song. I was originally quite attached to it staying a piano song but in the end we actually ended up getting rid of it, swapping it for a synth that sounded colder but still held hands with the original sound. There was a lot of that on this EP - learning to let go of original versions and finding something even closer to what I really wanted."

The Sight:

"‘Square One’ is blue. It’s very cold, almost metallic, silvery white, circular, rounded, spheres. It’s dissociative in a way, like me wading into the EP but not in the depths of the feelings yet."

‘Burning Trees’

The Story:

"‘Burning Trees’ was a long process. It again started as a piano demo that I recorded at home and forgot about. I was really shy about taking nearly fully formed ideas into sessions because I was so scared of losing it, like if it didn’t turn out the way i wanted to or didn’t feel authentic, i was stressed about not being able to get it back. But I went on a writing trip to LA last year and on the flight there I listened back to old demos. I didn’t know anyone on the trip, they didn’t know me so I was like ‘okay, i’m going to be brave’ - and ‘Burning Trees’ was the first thing I took into my first session there."

The Sound:

"I thought I knew what ‘Burning Trees’ should sound like until that trip. I think the distance helped, I was a year on from that original demo so I was definitely more open to new ideas and playing around in it and it quickly morphed into something very different from a piano ballad. I remember after the session I went back to my AirBnB and listened to it on repeat - I was obsessed, this is exactly what I wanted my music to sound like and it felt like I'd unlocked a part of myself that I'd been trying to get to for ages. But again - it was a long process, it felt like resurrecting myself as I was redefining these originally very sad, very personal tracks."

The Sight:

"It’s quite similar to in the visualiser - it’s got this red, eerie glow. It’s the kind of orange of when you’re walking down a street at night and the lights are glowing, that dark orange hue. It’s spooky, triangular, spikey, jagged - just like the song, with lots of textures and ups and downs. The colours are warmer but in a darker way, it’s ominous."

‘Renew Me’

The Story:

"I don’t remember what it was that had stressed me out on the walk to the studio but i was thinking about my school experience which really wasn’t amazing and i was getting progressively more and more annoyed and riled up. I went into the studio and was like “how do you write an upbeat song?” I felt like I needed to get the frustration out in a different way, I didn’t want it to be a sad one for once. ‘Renew Me’ needed to be upbeat. The backstory and the people it was about; they didn’t deserve my ballad. I didn’t want to give them anymore sadness - it was so liberating. This is the grow in the Grow Or Die."

The Sound:

"‘Renew Me’ could definitely have been attached to a sadder instrumental, but the producer helped me build this bright, upbeat world around them. He wrote the guitar part and I instantly knew what the song would be and just let myself go with it for once. The backing vocals were me screaming so every extra detail or layer just made it more cathartic. I wanted to channel my inner Katy Perry and not hold myself back at all. This one really brought something out of me that I didn't know existed. I never expected to write a song like this, it’s so different from anything else I've ever made."

The Sight:

“I feel confident about this one… i know exactly what this song looks like…”

"‘Renew Me’ is dark browns, dark oranges, deep red - it’s a warm, nostalgic palette. I feel like it grows and brings in so many different layers and sounds, I see it climbing towards a climax with all the elements weaving together and exploding. ‘Renew Me’ is very to the point; it’s clear while the others are more soundscapey."

‘California’

The Story:

“This is my heartbreak song” 

"‘California’ is again about struggling to get over someone, but in a phase where they’re in your dreams and feel present even when they’re not - it’s the depths of the feeling. I was thinking a lot about time zones and the feeling of a person living their life while i’m dreaming about them and vice versa. But I wrote it in two halves - the first when i was really at the height of heartbreak and then finished it when I was feeling fine which made it a lot more reflective. I only had the first verse and the guitar part originally then the chorus and second verse came with retrospect.

I think it's nice to write songs with a bit of distance when you’re feeling more okay. If i’d finished ‘California’ or ‘Burning Trees’ right when i started them, they’d be very different songs. I’m glad I sat on them, they grew with me."

The Sound:

"If any song on this EP was going to be a piano ballad, I think you’d assume it was going to be this one. This was another track that I'd half written and forgotten for a year before I got the bravery to take it into a session. The whole song feels like a dream in a way; it’s in 6/8 so it’s got this lulling hypnotic feeling to it. And then when we produced it out it became even more dreamy adding the slide guitars and things to build that world."

The Sight:

"I need to think about how to paint this one, i feel like I want to draw mountains again, like ‘Square One’ but different. It’s earthier and the guitar makes it warm. It feels hazy, almost so warm it’s dizzy."

‘If Not To Love You (Voice Memo)’

The Story + Sound:

"This voice memo really was a raw draft. I recorded it the second i finished writing at at this piano in my living room. It's so raw that one of the lyrics is even wrong but I knew if I ever re-recorded it I wouldn't get the same authenticity or effect. I like that I'm stumbling over it, I like the realness - I never really wanted to do anything else to it."

The Sight:

"It feels very whole - there’s nothing jagged, it feels very rounded, blue, white, soft - it’s pure." 

Grow or Die is out now

Grab your copy of the Gigwise print magazine here.

More about: Emma Bradley