Photo: BBC
Last night BBC 3 managed to identify arguably the worst three festival goers we've seen for a very long time. If you see this men in a field this summer, approach with caution.
Brighton's Charlie, Callum and Reece love dancing like a jellyfish to EDM, casual nudity and being revolting. They were the "stars" of BBC 3's Festivals, Sex and Suspicious Parents. There were so many low points: one of our trio announcing in the style of Jay from Inbetweeners' "I'm going to get at least 50 girls at least", a really creepy three-way kiss and copious amounts of projectile vomitting.
Our gruesome trio also pay a visit to Vienna Frequency festival where they strip naked, teabag a complete stranger and receive a disapproving look from the handsome Austrian barkeep. "Festivals are crazy... mad! Much madder than I thought!" says one reprobate, in the manner of Finchy from the Office suddenly discovering a deep love of the music of Diplo.
Naturally all this behaviour is watched by Charlie's mother Donna who looks on and laughs with a sense of adoring idiocy. When it gets to a point where the "lads" are discussing a competition about "the first one to finger a girls arse", one can only hope that a rogue digit finds its way towards her.
As Gawker Rich Juzwiak put it memorably when reviewing the show "What’s the word for “douchebag” in England?" Mr Juzwiak we find in situations like this the term 'bellend' tends to cover all bases.
