The Enemy's Tom Clarke has published a fairly lengthy and expletive-filled Twitter rant after a Time Out journalist described his band as "subtlety-deficient indie gnomes."
The singer was tweeted a photo of the magazine's preview of his band's forthcoming UK tour with The Twang, which said: "'Away From Here' is exactly where we'd like subtlety-deficient indie gnomes The Enemy to stay, but no: they're coming to London soon on a UK tour ahead of album number four."
It continued: "Even worse, daft Burmmie bellowers The Twang are the support act. Can someone put a bullet in indie's head already? Welcome back? God, no."
In response to the review, Clarke declared, "If I had a pound for everytime [sic] a journalist called me a hobbit I could buy enough bullets to round them up and disfigure the lot of them."
He also said a lot of other angry things, which you can read for yourself below, including the wonderful comeback, "Do me a favour and get yourself a life transplant," which we will be using ourselves from now on.
@Leonbradley7 @theenemyband @TimeOutLondon I like how they stooped to playground insults rather than anything insightful. Poor journalism.
— Tom Clarke (@tomclarke_enemy) September 9, 2014
If I had a pound for everytime a journalist called me a hobbit I could buy enough bullets to round them up and disfigure the lot of them.
— Tom Clarke (@tomclarke_enemy) September 9, 2014
Absolute fucking children. What they fail to appreciate is that I've achieved more than they ever will despite being a fucking hobbit.
— Tom Clarke (@tomclarke_enemy) September 9, 2014
Morons. Jealous, juvenile, inept, generically conformist morons. With your little pens. Do me a favour and get yourself a life transplant.
— Tom Clarke (@tomclarke_enemy) September 9, 2014
It's 2014 and we're still obsessed with what people look like instead of who they are or what they do. Society needs to grow the fuck up.
— Tom Clarke (@tomclarke_enemy) September 9, 2014
The Enemy will be taking a break from recording their upcoming fourth album for the dates, while fellow Midlanders The Twang will be promoting material from 2013's N E O N T W A N G.
Full dates are below, with tickets going on sale now. For more information visit here.
Thu December 04 2014 - BRISTOL O2 Academy Bristol
Fri December 05 2014 - LEICESTER O2 Academy Leicester
Sat December 06 2014 - LIVERPOOL O2 Academy Liverpool
Tue December 09 2014 - BOURNEMOUTH O2 Academy Bournemouth
Wed December 10 2014 - OXFORD O2 Academy Oxford
Thu December 11 2014 - LEEDS O2 Academy Leeds
Sun December 14 2014 - SHEFFIELD O2 Academy Sheffield
Wed December 17 2014 - GLASGOW O2 ABC
Thu December 18 2014 - NEWCASTLE UPON TYNE O2 Academy Newcastle
Fri December 19 2014 - LONDON O2 Shepherd's Bush Empire
Sat December 20 2014 - BIRMINGHAM O2 Academy Birmingham
